F U Buddy!

So... the topic on my mind today is f buddies. To have or not to have?

So you meet someone. They're attractive, they're cute, gosh darnnit they're just plain HOT!

Then they open their mouths and it all just goes to hell. They talk, they keep talking, and the more they talk the more you wonder whether or not their shoes have velco straps. Why oh why are the cute ones always so DUMB? And if they're not dumb then they're, in the famous words of Bridget Jones, complete fuckwatts.

Why do I bring this up? I met this cute guy. He's hot. He's STRONG... he's completely f'able. And then he opens his mouth and I start looking for the exit sign. So I've told him "No, I'm not interested". I've been nice about it, I've been polite about it, and then I've been down right rude about it. I roll my eyes, I breathe heavy (and not in the good way), I raise my voice and make wild hand gestures. He drives me NUTS! Sometimes I just want to kick him... really hard. Just when I'm about to kill him he picks me up and throws me over his shoulder like I weigh ten pounds.

Girls, let's do a collective swoon here.

So the other night I tell him that I'll TALK to him. Not date. I laid down the rules. No phone convo's, no demands on my time, don't get emotionally attached because I'm not promising anything. In fact I'm promising nothing. I don't want him to talk about the future, I don't want to meet his family, I don't want to know where he lives, and I DON'T want to talk about our FEELINGS. Gag.

And he agreed!

What can I say, he's young. Incredibly young. 20 in fact. I know, I know, what am I doing? This guy has basically told me that he'll be anything I want him to be. And that was such a complete turnoff. Call me crazy but I like my men to be... you know, men.

But then, funny thing happened. I got a power rush. I've never been the older woman before. I've never been the one in complete absolute charge either. It's like I'm a cat, and he's the mouse. I'm starting to get a kick out of it. He's so... moldable.

And trust me, the boy has a thing or two that he needs to learn about women. Which I could teach him. He needs to learn how to talk to them. Translation: Don't be so damn submissive! Not good. The only girls who like their boyfriends to be submissive are usually really bossy and mean. So unless he wants to be abused and treated badly he really needs to get a backbone.

But if I go ahead with this, aren't I being one of those bossy mean girls? Yuck. Morality issues on several issues, even though I haven't slept with him. Hmm.

Also, don't feel like adding another notch to my bedpost. Especially for someone that I'm not in love with. That's the second part of my problem. I'm 25, and personally I think that I'm just too old for this.
^
l
l
l (This) is all just a game. And I've played it before. Haven't we all? I keep thinking about that line from Hamlet, "My words rise up, my thoughts below. Words without thought to heaven never go." All this stuff is just action without substance, and what is the use of action without substance?

You see I'm not tired of romance or the opposite sex. I'm tired of pointlessness.